Part 10 of the 10 part series: Leader-friendly gardening practices to end bullying.

During this series, I discussed the social shift we need to make to help end bullying. I explained why adults should step up to ending bullying and how adults can empower children to take the lead on ending bullying in our lifetime and generations to come.

In addition, I explored in depth how the six leader-friendly gardening practices: be nonjudgmental, do not enable, use empathy, prune gossip, eliminate blame, and eradicate victimization can help end bullying.

These are practical actions that anyone can take and involve little time or money. They are a gift from you to those around and there is no better time to share that gift than the holidays.

My Story of Hope

Before I met my husband Terry, I realized I had been living my life as a victim. I was going through a divorce and I knew something had to change.

A colleague recommended a three-day course on how to live with power, freedom, and full self-expression. I took his suggestion and I went into the weekend looking for tips and techniques on how to change my life. What I got was the realization that my secret and shame had enabled me, at times, to be irresponsible and powerless in both my personal and professional life.

It was so simple; there was nothing to change except learning to be responsible for my experience and view of life. From the vantage point of not being a victim, I began to see my life differently - my inner power emerged and the freedom to express myself - like the innocent child I once was - came alive.

Then I met Terry on a camping trip. I had already formed an opinion about him based on what I had heard from others. The first night, sitting around the campfire, we were two single people with nothing in common except children and divorces. We watched the fire and began to share our divorce war stories (gossip). I decided to defer my judgment and listen to him.

Somewhere in the course of our conversation, the topic shifted from what our ex-spouses did (blame), to how we felt (victims). When I saw myself through Terry’s story, I shifted from being a victim to taking responsibility. It was like having a heart-to-heart conversation with my ex-husband about what it must have been like for him to live with me.

When I spoke about my life, Terry saw the same thing. For the first time, we saw ourselves through the eyes of our ex-spouses (empathy). We talked about what it would be like for our children if we took responsibility for our part in our respective divorces, rather than continuing to blame our ex-spouses. We knew of cases where blame and victimization had remained years after a divorce and neither of us wanted that.

By sharing our stories with an eye toward empathy, and taking responsibility for our failed marriages, Terry and I became friends, fell in love, and later became husband and wife.

Today we have a loving, blended, and thriving family Leadership Garden and do our best to use these six practices daily.

Will You Write Your Story of Hope?

Using leader-friendly gardening practices are not always easy, but neither is growing a flourshing vegetable gardening. However, the work is worth it because these practices afford you the opportunity to grow the scrumptious life you want.

Also, the leader-friendly gardening practices are really nothing new. These are age-old practices that provide insight into the age-old problem of bullying. They are framed in this "back to nature" way to help you think outside the daily grind of survival leadership, so will reclaim your power, refocus your energy, and reignite your spirit to achieve your lost and forgotten dreams.

When you view your life as a unique leader utilizing these practices, you are connecting your highest good and life wisdom. You are drawing upon your unique experiences; not as a concept, rather a daily practice that creates the reality you desire at home, in school, around the community, or on the job. 

You cannot predict or control every circumstance in your life. Yet as a thriving leader, you can gracefully weather life storms that do come your way. In doing so, you pave the way for the children in your life to thrive and re-sows these seeds of greatness in each of you.

I hope you will use these practices to cultivate the best holiday ever and grow a flourishing New Year as your gift to you and those around you.

Love,

Debra

P.S. Please take some time to reflect and write your story of hope. To aid you in that process, pick up your Adult Empowerment Tool Kit Bundle today.  I guarantee it will help you write your story of hope and I would love to showcase your story in the coming year.